OK, this is all now Old News. But it's also still good news for churches like ours, if we are in a position to take advantage of it. What are the three most important qualities newcomers are looking for when seeking a new church? Believe it or not, it has almost NOTHING to do with theological orientation, political correctness, or denominational affiliation. Rather, the three most important factors seem to be
1) Location: how close is it to my home? how long will it take for me to get there? how easy will it be for me to find a place to park, etc. etc.
2) Leadership: in particular, how much do I like the minister, and do they really seem to practice what they preach? Is the minister open-minded or judgmental? Genuinely interested in me, or only interested in what I can contribute to the church?"
3) Overall Fit and Friendliness: do I really feel at home here, or is something just not right? How welcome do I feel, are people glad to see me, how easy has it been to form "honest to God" friendships?
It almost goes without saying that people who have been members of a particular congregation for a significant period of time tend to forget what their church looks like to someone who is passing through the doors for the first time. That first impression is critical; I've even seen research suggesting that most first-time visitors have made up their minds about whether or not they will return within about 30 seconds of their arrival. The second visit is even more important; if there is just one person there who remembers the newcomer and greets them by name, the odds of that person eventually becoming a formal member of the congregation skyrocket. So make up your mind to meet someone new yourself this next Sunday. Sure, you could make a mistake, and accidently greet someone who has been attending First Parish for 20 years. But that wouldn't be such a bad thing either, would it?
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Four Stages of Stewardship
A colleague of mine posted these to one of the ministerial internet CHAT-groups I read. I thought it was interesting, so I'm passing it along.
The Consumer pays for services received. The church is a store.
The Co-Op Member pays fair share of expenses. The church is a shared facility -- like a cabin shared by siblings.
The Owner invests more than necessary to create more. The church is a small business enterprise.
The Benefactor invests for the benefit of others with no hope of personal return. The church is a gift to the future.
Of course, my reflections didn't end there either. Because this list also reminded me of the "Golden Ladder of Giving" by the medieval Jewish philosopher Maimonides, which I first learned about from "Building Your Own Theology."
Maimonides' Eight Degrees of Charity (from about.com/judaism)
8. When donations are given grudgingly.
7. When one gives less than he should, but does so cheerfully.
6. When one gives directly to the poor upon being asked.
5. When one gives directly to the poor without being asked.
4. When the recipient is aware of the donor's identity, but the donor does not know the identity of the recipient.
3. When the donor is aware of the recipient's identity, but the recipient is unaware of the source.
2. When the donor and recipient are unknown to each other.
1. The highest form of charity is to help sustain a person before they become impoverished by offering a substantial gift in a dignified manner, or by extending a suitable loan, or by helping them find employment or establish themselves in business so as to make it unnecessary for them to become dependent on others.
In these hard economic times, the mission of the church becomes ever more pressing and essential. But for those of us who have been fortunate enough to still have the ability to be generous, perhaps these words will be an inspiration to become true benefactors, both to neighbors known and unknown.
The Consumer pays for services received. The church is a store.
The Co-Op Member pays fair share of expenses. The church is a shared facility -- like a cabin shared by siblings.
The Owner invests more than necessary to create more. The church is a small business enterprise.
The Benefactor invests for the benefit of others with no hope of personal return. The church is a gift to the future.
Of course, my reflections didn't end there either. Because this list also reminded me of the "Golden Ladder of Giving" by the medieval Jewish philosopher Maimonides, which I first learned about from "Building Your Own Theology."
Maimonides' Eight Degrees of Charity (from about.com/judaism)
8. When donations are given grudgingly.
7. When one gives less than he should, but does so cheerfully.
6. When one gives directly to the poor upon being asked.
5. When one gives directly to the poor without being asked.
4. When the recipient is aware of the donor's identity, but the donor does not know the identity of the recipient.
3. When the donor is aware of the recipient's identity, but the recipient is unaware of the source.
2. When the donor and recipient are unknown to each other.
1. The highest form of charity is to help sustain a person before they become impoverished by offering a substantial gift in a dignified manner, or by extending a suitable loan, or by helping them find employment or establish themselves in business so as to make it unnecessary for them to become dependent on others.
In these hard economic times, the mission of the church becomes ever more pressing and essential. But for those of us who have been fortunate enough to still have the ability to be generous, perhaps these words will be an inspiration to become true benefactors, both to neighbors known and unknown.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Tempus Fugit
***
How Time Flies. And before too long, Tim will be flying out of here as well. With only a couple of months left in his tenure here at First Parish, the opportunities for saying our personal “fare-wells” are quickly disappearing.
But the Committee on Ministry is planning a variety of occasions to help remedy this situation. For starters, there is always your old fashioned “BLCS” appointment. “Breakfast, Lunch, Coffee, Supper” -- just pick a date (or two, just in case), pick up the phone, call Tim at his local number [(207) 233-7035 - you can also e-mail him at uucleric
Another option is to host a small party for Tim and a handful of other church members in your own home. Again, this doesn’t have to be elaborate: it can be anything from a traditional church potluck or sit-down dinner party to delivery pizza or some kind of take-out. There are plenty of dates available to do this; Tim is basically free every night except the Saturdays before he preaches (May 9th and May 23rd) or when otherwise committed to attend a church committee meeting. Once again, if you would like to host a party like this, it is best first to confirm a time and date with Tim, and then set out to plan the menu and the guest list.
Finally, the COM is coordinating a handful of events at church for people who prefer to say their good-byes in public. These include after-church get-togethers similar to the “Meet the Minister” sessions for newcomers, as well as an all-church reception and picnic following Tim’s final sermon here Memorial Day weekend, May 24th.
Tim’s time among us has been much too short, but profoundly intense. Please take the time to tell Tim what his ministry has meant to you, and to wish him well in his on-going battle with cancer. In the long run, we think you will be happy that you did.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
THE ECLECTIC CLERIC - “Spring is sprung...
***
the grass is riz, I wonder where the flowers is?” This brief bit of doggrel verse is one of my many memories from childhood, something that I learned from my father, and he no doubt from his father before that...passed down perhaps through so many generations that its actual origins are lost in obscurity.
There are lots of things in our lives like this, and the accuracy of their transmission is no guarantee of the quality of their content. Communications theorists sometimes call them “memes” -- tiny snippets of information which combine together as bits of code in order to form larger patterns of meaning, in much the same way that our “genes” combine together to create a genetic code that both defines who we are in a biological sense, and is passed down to subsequent generations as well.
As I prepare to leave First Parish, I find myself wondering what my “memetic” legacy to this congregation will be in years to come. I hope, for example, that the value of Radical Hospitality, and the vision of being “A Warm & Welcoming Place in the Heart of the City,” will both continue to thrive and grow here. These are ideas that I both brought with me, and that I also learned from you in an authentic and “honest to God” process of memetic cross-pollination. “Open all the windows and the doors, and receive whomsoever is sent.” It’s a worthwhile goal worthy of our faithful devotion. Yet it also requires a commitment to being “accessible to otherness,” and greeting neighbors and strangers alike with loving hearts, open minds, and helping hands.
I also hope that the support, encouragement, and gracious generosity that you have shown to me as I have wrestled with my illness will continue to be part of the personality of this congregation. Generosity breeds Gratitude and Gratitude in return breeds Generosity -- it is a classic “positive feedback loop” that has the potential to save the world from itself. So embrace these values in your own lives, teach them to your children and to their children, and know that with each good deed you do you plant the seed for another somewhere down the line.
Finally, I hope that this congregation will remember as fondly as I will the robust Spirit that filled the Meetinghouse the week I originally candidated here in May 2007, and again at my Installation the following Spring, and especially at last year’s Easter Sunday service, which might well have turned out to have been the last sermon I preached in my ministerial career. As it did turn out, thanks to your support I was able to return to the pulpit this past fall -- perhaps not as good as I ever was, but I hope good enough to serve!
Now I’m off in a few months the West Coast (and ultimately to the San Francisco Bay Area) to rest, recuperate and recover as best I can at my Father’s place in Fair Oaks. No one can say with any certainty what the future may bring, but I know my prayers are for ongoing vitality and prosperity here at First Parish, and for a long and happy life for myself. And may we all feel blessed by the too-short-of-time we shared together, and grieve the lose of “what might have been.”
the grass is riz, I wonder where the flowers is?” This brief bit of doggrel verse is one of my many memories from childhood, something that I learned from my father, and he no doubt from his father before that...passed down perhaps through so many generations that its actual origins are lost in obscurity.
There are lots of things in our lives like this, and the accuracy of their transmission is no guarantee of the quality of their content. Communications theorists sometimes call them “memes” -- tiny snippets of information which combine together as bits of code in order to form larger patterns of meaning, in much the same way that our “genes” combine together to create a genetic code that both defines who we are in a biological sense, and is passed down to subsequent generations as well.
As I prepare to leave First Parish, I find myself wondering what my “memetic” legacy to this congregation will be in years to come. I hope, for example, that the value of Radical Hospitality, and the vision of being “A Warm & Welcoming Place in the Heart of the City,” will both continue to thrive and grow here. These are ideas that I both brought with me, and that I also learned from you in an authentic and “honest to God” process of memetic cross-pollination. “Open all the windows and the doors, and receive whomsoever is sent.” It’s a worthwhile goal worthy of our faithful devotion. Yet it also requires a commitment to being “accessible to otherness,” and greeting neighbors and strangers alike with loving hearts, open minds, and helping hands.
I also hope that the support, encouragement, and gracious generosity that you have shown to me as I have wrestled with my illness will continue to be part of the personality of this congregation. Generosity breeds Gratitude and Gratitude in return breeds Generosity -- it is a classic “positive feedback loop” that has the potential to save the world from itself. So embrace these values in your own lives, teach them to your children and to their children, and know that with each good deed you do you plant the seed for another somewhere down the line.
Finally, I hope that this congregation will remember as fondly as I will the robust Spirit that filled the Meetinghouse the week I originally candidated here in May 2007, and again at my Installation the following Spring, and especially at last year’s Easter Sunday service, which might well have turned out to have been the last sermon I preached in my ministerial career. As it did turn out, thanks to your support I was able to return to the pulpit this past fall -- perhaps not as good as I ever was, but I hope good enough to serve!
Now I’m off in a few months the West Coast (and ultimately to the San Francisco Bay Area) to rest, recuperate and recover as best I can at my Father’s place in Fair Oaks. No one can say with any certainty what the future may bring, but I know my prayers are for ongoing vitality and prosperity here at First Parish, and for a long and happy life for myself. And may we all feel blessed by the too-short-of-time we shared together, and grieve the lose of “what might have been.”
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)